Everyone's version of normal is different

What counts as fine in one house is a nightmare in another. Some people do dishes the second they're done. Some people let them pile up for a week and genuinely don't notice. Neither of you is wrong, you've just never had to negotiate this with a stranger before.

What actually helps

• Say something as early as you can, before it becomes a big deal. A quick "could we sort a rough dishes rota?" in week two is much easier than an anonymous note in week six.
•  Give people the benefit of the doubt first. Everyone's adjusting, not just you.
• It's okay to set boundaries. You don't have to be best friends with everyone in your flat, being civil and considerate is enough.

You can't choose your flat mates in halls, but you can be a bit more deliberate about who you end up living with after that. roome's personality quiz asks about the stuff that actually causes friction, cleanliness, noise, how often people have guests round, so future housemates are less of a guessing game.

Living with strangers is a strange thing to do, and it's okay if it takes a bit of trial and error to figure out how your flat works. Most people land on a rhythm eventually, yours will too.

Find your people on roome.